Blush in the concrete
We were 3 on a bike when we noticed a cop directing the traffic at the junction. I got down from the bike and let the other two go, to catch up, after walking past the cop. While I reached near the constable, he asked “ What happened, they dropped you ?”
I said , “oh! you saw us, sorry, they will wait for me, ahead”
He just smiled and felt happy about the respect he got.
How did it work ?
I was wrong, in breaking the rules, he was wrong in not issuing a ticket to us , in spite of all that, there were just smiles all around.
He was in an authoritarian position and his ego should have driven him to take action against me.
My respect for him overcame his ego. This is an old story.
Another occasion, I went to school for my daughter’s admission in standard XI. A tough looking owner or chairman, I cannot remember, and his two accomplices, asks me to sit down and looks at me and asks, “ yes, what do you want”.
“I have come for admission for my daughter, if possible please allow her to appear for the test, she has secured 94% marks in her 10th.”
“Today everybody gets in 90s, nothing great, why don’t you go to …”(he mentions a few schools), “why do you want to come here ?”. He said , dropping the mark sheet on the table. Here the EGO had a tone , that happens when some one has a high reputation and you don’t have one.
I looked into his eyes and said firmly, “Because this is the best school”.
I saw a blush on the concrete face.
They lost control of their hands and mind, one picked up a glass and put it back, the other picked the copy of the mark sheet and handed over to the member next to him, the member had an expression of what do I do with this. After a few seconds, the chairman looked at me and said “she will have to appear for a test” and instructed the lady next to him to arrange for the test. Daughter did well and got admission.
The ego has a weakness for appreciation, even for flattery . Here I was honest and it was genuine.
All the above incidents makes me look like an expert ego handler. I am not, otherwise I would have been a successful marketing guy. That is one area, with my style of functioning, a lot left to be desired
In relationship, ego plays a big role. It can create all the unwanted emotions, misunderstanding and issues. It is about self, the capital “ I”, Iness.
Tennessee Williams– “Nobody sees anybody truly but all through the flaws of their own egos. That is the way we all see …each other in life. Vanity, fear, desire, competition– all such distortions within our own egos– condition our vision of those in relation to us. Add to those distortions to our own egos the corresponding distortions in the egos of others, and you see how cloudy the glass must become through which we look at each other”
There is a pure us, inside, shrouded by an ego. Ego, the self love and selfishness that directs us in our conscious state. Every body has ego, some big, the others, less.
Most of the time, the ego acts in a destructive way. The ego is looking for power and falsely creates a complex. People having inferior or superiority complex lives under the cover of EGO.
Besides you, your boss has it, everybody around you has it, only the degree varies.
In offices, they manipulate, to get rewarded, appreciated and even promoted before they crash into reality.
We encounter this issue with association members of the layout you live in, the flat owners, office, community, joint family, professional bodies, what am I trying to list, it’s there in every group. Look out for the signs, they simply oppose, refuse to go along with the majority decision. They oppose, by refusing to pay the contributions with some clumsy reasons and enjoy the facilities free of cost.
Ego raises its head, when someone thinks he has power. Notice the buses on the roads, road kings, will stop where ever they like, make people, young and old, run after them to board, while the driver enjoys the miseries of others in the rear view mirror.
It is the ego that corrupts power.
They think that everything they do or say is right. Their world revolves around their own perfect image. It can be tough but there are ways to deal with an egoist
In early stage of my life, one goal was to be egoless, ego, size zero. Unless you are a saint, it is not the right goal to have. You will be walked over by all and sundry.
My ego in action, when
I feel insecure and try to cover it up by appearing more confident or competent than I really believe I am,
I make up stories to impress other people.
I want to be the centre of attention in all situations, the limelight
I cannot take rejection, criticism or competition..
I think how things should be done and people should behave. When it do not happen my way, it angers me and end up shouting at others
People like and accept you much more when you allow yourself to be human and fallible like the rest of us.
Tell the truth – your life, and stories, are interesting.
Let someone else have the limelight, you will feel good.
Don’t compare yourself with anyone. You are unique..
See the world from their point of view.
The only opinion that really counts is the one you have of yourself. The work that needs doing is not on the outside but inside.
Strengthen your inner resources rather that controlling external circumstances.
Be humble, all your relationships will improve.
“I” do not achieve anything on my own, its “WE”.
Simplify life, love & live with others peacefully
Have a giving attitude than getting
Do not be a slave of your ego.
For believers in GOD, ego is Erasing God Out
Michael Elijah writes: “Learn how to kill your ego. It blinds and fetters us from possibility and progress. Learn how to burst your bubble with simple questions [such] as, ‘What if things aren’t what they seem to be?’ and vitally, ‘What if I am wrong?'”
Ego as an item line in business
In Egonomics, David Marcum & Steven Smith has this to say,
Ego is an invisible item line on every company s profit and loss statement. It can be a greatest asset or most expensive liability.
On the profit side ego sparks the fire to invent and achieve, the nerves to try something new and the tenacity to conquer adversities that inevitably come.
Of we manage ego wisely, we get the upside it delivers followed by strong returns. But when that intense, persistent force inside manages us, companies suffer real economic losses.
Throw away good money after bad decisions.
When we momentarily lose control of ego, we can lose a lot : trust, respect, relationship, influences, talent, careers, client and market shares.
Management of the ego of the human beings in business is the biggest challenge. It affects the business one way or the other.
What makes us think that the earth needs us, we need the earth, cool down.
Why does it take more than a million sperms to fertilize one egg?
Gynaecologist: Two reasons:
- *Female Ego..*
Rejection without reason.
- *Male Ego..*
Won’t ask for directions.