Whats your name ?”
“Raj.”
“What raj ?”
“Just raj”
“How can it be ? Kamraj, Maharaj, Thyagarj… you must be some raj. He kept quiet and started staring at the other guy.”
“Raj kumar,” the other guy said.
“Thats better.”
I am in a train with a side berth allotted to me, could not help watching this interaction.
I got a whiff, he is drunk and drunk’s behaviour is erratic. No logic works .
I could see the other guy getting stressed.
I took over , more to help the other guy out
“Have you brought your dinner ?”
“Yes but it is too early to eat.”
“Where are you going ?”
“Where is this train going to ?”
“Bangalore”
“In a Bangalore bound train, I cant go to Trivandrumi, can I ?” He looked around with a hahahaha.
I thought of helping the stressed guy and I got this.
It was a meaningless situation, I had an option to get stressed or lighten things.
Don’t sweat the small stuff, .
Hahaha, I replied,” I like your humour”. He gave me a smile and I gave a wink to the other guy
I took out a book titled “treat for tat” where the author tells you instead of tit for tat, treat for tat.
After a while, I saw the drunk looking for a foothold to get on to top berth, I lent a helping hand to heave him up, making sure he gets on top and puts us out of his reach. Phew..
I woke up in the middle of the night. The train had stopped. Our man, the drunk, was looking down from his berth and asked our other guy on a lower berth “ Which is the station”.
The other guy on the lower berth turned his head and tried to see through the dirty window glass of the train, the station’s name. The he sat up and put his hand on the window glass to see. He could not find the stations name.
A big sized man was passing by, perhaps going to the rest room. The guy on the lower berth asked the huge guy which is the station.
Where do you want to go.
I am going to Bangalore. Which is this station.
Bangalore will not come before 7 in the morning. Never mind this station. Go to sleep. And he walked away.
The drunk on the top berth turned and went to sleep., the other guy quietly slid on to his berth and covered himself
Here was stress in three directions, one who gave, the other who took and a third who simply kicked. It off.
You may not be aware, a stress in you can create a stressful environment, which affects any body under the influence of the flux. This in turn changes their behaviour and has a chain effect.
A lot of us think we have no stress. Big stress has a reason like loss of a dear one, unemployment, financial crisis, a ditch or a broken marriage. The causes of major stress falls under three categorise, Health, finance and relationship.
There are plenty of small ones that can accumulate and give you blood pressure, diabetes, heart attack, back pain and neck pain . They may be
Saying yes when you want to say no,
A salesman applying pressure on you,
Leaking pipe at home,
A punctured tyre,
A flickering tube light
The maid with a broom, pushing you around from room to room, upsetting your comfort
Excess commitments
Waiting for someone not showing up on time,
a minor health problem for self or family members
traffic,
misplaced keys,
Searching for your mobile in silent mode,
Slow internet
Wardrobe full, nothing to wear
Shoe rack door cannot be closed due to the number of never to be used foot wears
Old newspapers stacked badly
Cables, cables and cables of your gadgets
Junk drawers full of unusable items
A dried up pen when trying to note down some info coming through the phone
Missing or broken tools
An attic filled with unused items
A car trunk or back seat full of trash
Incomplete vehicle maintenance
Card board boxes of your TV, fridge
Computer files not backed up or data needing to be converted for storage
Desk surface cluttered or disorganized for days together
Family pictures never put into an album
Mending, ironing, or other piles of items to repair or discard
Deferred household maintenance
Bulbs to be replaced
Fan not working
Broken furniture to be repaired
Books lying scattered for want of book shelf
Time not spend with people you’ve been meaning to spend time with
A missing button in your favourite pant
The right pair of socks
The morning walks, your promise yourself every night
The heel of your footwear drops off
and a million others.
How many can you identify with, in the above list and what others do you have
Not accepting the reality and resisting them is the fundamental cause of stress. When something happens, we spend a lot of time wishing it did not happen. We cannot undo something that has happened. We can, may be, redo, do it another way, learn from it and prevent its occurrence in the future.
Your house keys are not in place where it should have been and you are in a hurry to go out. The blame game starts and everybody gets worked up. Finally its found, The family is busy arguing over it and pushes the person behind the wheel to speed up.. We are delayed. The cop whistles and directs you to the side for rushing past a red signal. Looking back, the wedding was attended. They piled up a lot of stress and later may be a laughing material. Learn to laugh while its happening.
Check what is causing the discomfort and ask why ?The solution is not doing something to divert your mind like a song or going for a walk. The stress will be back after your replacement activity is over.
Action is the solution. Awareness, being aware while doing something. If the tyre is punctured, get it repaired, if the heal goes off and you have no immediate solution hold the foot ware in your hand or put it in a bag and walk barefoot, yes, walk barefoot and enjoy, don’t worry what others are thinking. You can live a stress free life if you stop worrying about what others are thinking of you
If your pant splits at the seam, put out your shirt and tell people you are covering the slit and everybody will enjoy it..
If the internet is slow, read a book in between clicks.
When you want to do some cleaning job, keep away from printed matters else you will have a special interest in reading things which you never wanted to and leave your task incomplete..
If you are not interested in taking any calls switch it off, believe me everything can wait. You can call them back.
If traffic is a pain, use a cab. It will cost you less than owning a car. Sitting in a cab, you can use your lap top or cell.
The solution to stress is take action on the subject rather than singing, painting or watching a movie to run away.
And the biggest of them all is to answer nature’s call, you don’t have paper or place
Very good article on stress and management.
Thanks Padma. If you know some more, you can add it to the list
Stress is a part of our life.Some stresses are good but most of the stresses are bad.A number of ways have been suggested by various experts to over come stress.Suppose a guy is having extra marital relations and is always under stress /fear .What will happen if someone comes to know about the relation. Is there a solution .
That problem comes under the category of relationship, one of the three major stresses. If there is a guilt, then stop it, else let the affected person know else play hide and seek till you get caught.
Sir , simple solution, Question yourself….. why do you want such relationships ???? why do you want to have such EXTRAAA relationships which will not give you peace of mind, but only problems,,,,, what are you seeking in that, instead question yourself what is wrong with the present, how it can be resolved, you will find it more better than looking for what you will not get….
Thank you, Ramachandra. It is one of the good solutions.
Congrats for an interesting write up on the causes of stress and ways to overcome them.
Thank you. If you find anything useful from my posts, you are welcome to share. Appreciate your blog’s intentions.